After teaching class this week and sharing my personal struggles with discrepancies in my life related to the curriculum, I went back to revisit a post I made over two years ago related to “Silent Sam.” A confederate monument. This post was prompted by anger that I experienced related to a family group text in which a family member sent a picture of my cousin, a police officer, in front of “Silent Sam” during protests at UNC-Chapel Hill in 2018. What fueled my anger specifically, was that a family member called the protestors “idiots" and my father mentioned MLK and talked about the importance of non-violent protests. I asked myself, “Isn’t this form of protesting non-violent?"
Here is the original Facebook post:
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August 26, 2018
Silent Sam.
“A riot is the language of the unheard” (MLK).
Peaceful protests are an oxymoron and I deeply respect MLK’s dedication. Even MLK made distinctions in protests costing lives and destruction of property. If you have ever been on a college campus during a protest, then you know that the tension and anger is palpable, far from peaceful.
The US invaded Iraq on false pretenses and pulled down a statue of Saddam Hussein. This was broadcasted all over the news, people cheered, and the US was hailed and the toppiling of the statue signified an end to the battle of Baghdad. The US was not charged with destruction of property of another nation. If you tell me that pulling down a statue of a dictator in another country was a good thing and yet condemn the removal of a symbol of hate in our own country (e.g., Silent Sam), then you are contradicting the removal of a physical symbol that represents oppression.
Students and community members at UNC went through proper authorities repeatedly asking for the removal of the statue, but were denied. There is a law in a place that prohibits the removal of historical statues. Thus, the removal of any statue, controversial or not, is a legal issue and, in the case of silent Sam, one that has turned into a social and political uproar. Thus, it’s up to legislation to tackle the issue and address the needs of the community, and legislators need to step up to the plate.
Keep in mind that Silent Sam was erected by a UNC student group, paid for by alumnus, and dedicated by a KKK member who during his speech espoused hate towards Blacks and bragged about beating an African American woman. Very few people truly understand the magnitude and volume of Africans trafficked during slavery (12.5 million). The discrimination and oppression that followed is something that our society is still grappling with. Silent Sam was a fervent issue during the 1960’s and we are just revisiting unresolved racial tension and the continuation of institutionalized oppression.
If a statue of Adolf Hitler, holding a gas chamber with no gas, was erected at Radford University by a student organization, paid for by alums, and at its dedication, hatred towards Jews and all the other groups that were murdered, including homosexuals was championed, and our students and community requested its removal and this request was stonewalled, then I would actively participate in the removal of such a statue. I would gladly face misdemeanor charges for destruction of property and welcomed being called an “idiot” for standing up to hate, discrimination, and institutionalized oppression.
Never Again.
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The current social and political climate and this week’s lecture highlighted my need to be introspective and a reminder that I have some self-work to do. This past week’s lecture was related to middle childhood cognitive development. In this stage of development, children grow out of the black and white, preoperational thinking, and move into the gray murky layers of logic. They have reversibility and flexibility in their thinking, lending the individual to readily see hypocrisy. Contradictions and discrepancies seem to pop up and smack them unwittingly in the face.
Dr. Kolberg's stages of moral development is another framework discussed in lecture this week. This six stage theory highlights the moral development of people and claims that the majority of the population do not progress stage four. During the conventional level (i.e., containing stage 3 and 4), an individual’s sense of morality is tied to personal and societal relationships. Children continue to accept the rules of authority figures, but this is now because they believe that this is necessary to ensure positive relationships and societal order.
• Stage 4. Maintaining the Social Order. The child/individual becomes aware of the wider rules of society, so judgments concern obeying the rules in order to uphold the law and to avoid guilt.
The last two stages are encompassed by the post-conventional level. Individual judgment is based on self-chosen principles, and moral reasoning is based on individual rights and justice. Only 10-15% of individuals are capable of the kind of abstract thinking necessary for stage 5 or 6 (post-conventional morality). That is to say, most people take their moral views from those around them and only a minority think through ethical principles for themselves.
• Stage 5. Social Contract and Individual Rights. The child/individual becomes aware that while rules/laws might exist for the good of the greatest number, there are times when they will work against the interest of particular individuals.
• Stage 6. Universal Principles. People at this stage have developed their own set of moral guidelines which may or may not fit the law. The principles apply to everyone. For example, human rights, justice, and equality. The person will be prepared to act to defend these principles even if it means going against the rest of society in the process and having to pay the consequences of disapproval and or imprisonment. Kohlberg doubted few people reached this stage.
Revisiting these concepts and Silent Sam was fresh on my mind. A discrepancy exists for me. I am the great, great, great granddaughter of a confederate soldier. And yet, the meaning I hold for the confederate flag is one of contempt. The meaning in which we as individuals give an object must be respected. The meaning resides within the individual and is shaped by their values, beliefs, and lived experiences. I understand that my family members hold a different perspective regarding the confederate flag. What I have grappled with is the lack of understanding and respect they give me with the issues of social and political unrest. I, seemingly, “don’t understand” and need to be educated. They send me videos and messages that dismiss and disregard my perspectives. The inability for them to engage in perspective taking, leaves me feeling bowled over by a steam roller. As if my opinion, however shaped, does not even matter. My perspective is irrelevant. Discarded. Disregarded.
It is sometimes a surreal experience. Not being well understood by my family members. My family members not taking the time to listen or truly get to know me, but instead, imposing their own values and beliefs upon me. Keep in mind I am close to 50. It is a form of rejection. Lack of acceptance. It bothers me that my family members read my blog posts and talk to each other about my perspectives. But, they don’t talk directly to me. It is a bazar feeling when your family member sends you a text that links to the definition of homelessness after I informed my family that I founded a non-profit related to unaccompanied homeless youth. A link to a definition was rudimentary considering how active I have been with this population over the past several years. As if I were unaware of the definition. As if I did not experience being kicked out of the house at 17. As if I needed help from a more experienced elder. This person would probably say, they meant well. They were trying to help. I wonder, if they knew me, knew my experiences, knew my perspectives, if they understood me and my work, would their line of thinking be different? I wonder if they still view me as a two-year old blonde toddler roaming around looking for rocks to put in my mouth.
I reflected upon a ceremony dedicated to my great, great, great grandfather in which an official headstone marking his grave was placed. This was several years ago. Where his remains are located is in a very rural area and I knew finding it would be challenging. My father informed me that there was no road sign where you turn, but to “look for the flag.” I drove for an hour and half to get to the area. And, after driving for over an hour trying to locate the graveyard, I finally gave up. When I reconnected with my family later, my dad asked, “didn’t you see the flag?” And, that is when I realized that I had passed a gigantic confederate flag several times. It gave me chills when I passed it and I blocked it from my vision. I focused on something else. I just did not connect the flag directly to me. My family. My loved ones. The meaning I ascribe to that symbol, is one of hate, oppression, and racism. I didn’t see it because I could not make the active connection to my family. Where laughter and love reside.
This is the discrepancy for me. Something I wrestle with. I can’t ignore the active racism I witness in my day to day experiences. A video post of a mother encouraging her White toddler to say the N word and laughing hysterically. I can’t turn my head when I hear my students of color discuss their experiences, trauma, and pain related to the discrimination they have faced in their own lives. They are 19. I can’t look the other way when I see educational systemic oppression.
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